Falling in love in Rwanda

July 20, 2008

What can I say? It happened. His name is Patrick.

But it isn’t what you may think.

He is fourteen, studying in the secondary 2 year at a school here in the Northern Province. He is a traditional intole dancer, an accomplished one, in fact—he is a member of the national troupe that danced at President Kagame’s brother’s wedding last night.

Patrick and I met on the street, where it seems all young people hang out to socialize in their free time. I, not being a young person, was on my way back to town after working in the office. He and I started talking, and it struck me immediately that Patrick is different from the other kids I’ve met on the street who want to sell me something or just ask straight out for money. I still can’t describe why he is different, but I definitely felt a connection with him.

Here was this young man—I asked his age even though I knew he is fourteen (being as I am quite familiar with that age)—who was tidy, polite, well-spoken. The best way I can describe Patrick is that he is open. He is calm, conducts himself with the same pride that is evident in the vast majority of Rwandans, and there is a transparency in his face and manner.

Oh, and did I mention his smile? It lights up his face.

Something just goes click.

You know what I’m talking about.

I met his family last night. Julius, coordinator extraordinaire, was our translator and facilitator. I met Patrick’s older sister and her young children, as well as her mother-in-law and (I think) sisters-in-law. So these are all the female members of his family. His sister is married, but I didn’t meet her husband last night.

If you’re reading carefully, you will have noticed two missing family members: Patrick doesn’t have a mother or father. His mother died in an accident and his father died of a heart attack while studying or working in India. Asking further about this story is not only inappropriate, but could traumatize Patrick, so that’s the story. So I’ve offered to be Patrick’s educational sponsor.

Already an orphan in a developing nation, Patrick faces increasing vulnerability, especially in terms of his education. Whereas 99% of Rwandan children attend primary school where the fees are low, less than 50% of young Rwandans attend secondary school. In a country whose only natural resource is its people, Rwanda desperately needs educated young people, especially people like Patrick, who is very bright.

However, in this culture that values the primacy of the group, often at the expense of the individual, Patrick will face increasing pressure to cede to the needs of the larger family group because he doesn’t have a mother or father to advocate directly for him. Patrick’s sister, who clearly values education and the opportunities it affords, pays for the education of not only her children, but some in the extended family as well. But my financing of his school fees ensures that Patrick can finish secondary school and focus his energies on winning a scholarship to the national university here in a few years. He now has an advocate.

When I was meeting Patrick’s family at his house last night, I realized how vulnerable his family feels. When both Patrick and his sister asked when I was leaving the country—now nine days—I saw worry flash across their faces. It must be terrible to have promises made but not kept. What if this muzungu got swept away while she was in the country and made all these promises, but then when she gets home, other priorities arise or she forgets or or or….

So Julius and I and Patrick’s sister will draw up a written agreement, a memo of understanding, in which I commit to paying Patrick’s school fees and related educational expenses, and his extended family will continue to advise him and provide continuing familial and cultural support. Julius will try to get Patrick placed in a better school and will scan and email me Patrick’s grade reports.

All this is made easier because Julius has a brand-new NGO called Help Life Rwanda that focuses on secondary school scholarships for Rwanda’s most at-risk youth. HLR will identify ten especially vulnerable young people (nine now) who are experiencing difficulty funding their secondary school education, particularly the school fees that are currently about US$100 a term, roughly $300 a year. Julius, who has a degree in management and accounting, will channel school fees from donors directly to the schools. The kids are easy to find, especially because NAR has youth clubs in all Rwandan provinces. Donors, on the other hand, are more difficult for Julius to find.

So you know what I’m going to ask next.

If you feel inclined to make an important difference in a kid’s life and you can afford to fund one of these scholarships—or even a part of one—please consider this program. I’m happy to email you with more information. Rwanda’s future rests on the creativity and critical thinking of its youth. The country has come so far in fourteen years. Its future is bright.

Consider it a good long-term investment in peace and reconciliation.